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How To Say “No, Thanks” To That Holiday Event

How To Say “No, Thanks” To That Holiday Event

I don’t know about you, but every year there’s a moment where the festive season suddenly shifts. One minute it feels light and fun, and the next you’re looking at your calendar wondering how you’re meant to keep up. The plans, the gatherings, the family expectations, the noise. It piles up quickly.

And if you’re a pregnant mama or a new mum, that shift hits even harder. Your body is tired. Your emotions sit closer to the surface. Your capacity feels completely different to what it used to be. Suddenly a season that is meant to feel joyful can feel crowded and overwhelming.

If that sounds familiar, you’re not the only mum feeling it. This time of year can be beautiful, but it can also stretch you in ways people don’t always notice.

You’re allowed to leave early or take a breather

There were so many gatherings where I stayed far longer than my body wanted to. I kept conversations going even when my brain felt foggy. I didn’t want to seem rude or let anyone down.

Looking back, I wish I’d given myself permission to listen to my own limits. Stepping out for a moment of quiet or heading home early doesn’t make you difficult. It makes you honest about what you can hold. A gentle, “I’m going to take a little break,” is more than enough. You don’t owe anyone a perfect performance during the festive season.

You don’t have to take on every piece of advice

Something about December brings out a sudden wave of opinions. People mean well, but their comments can land heavily when you’re already navigating new motherhood. I used to take those little remarks straight to heart and let them unsettle me long after the moment had passed.

What shifted everything was realising I didn’t need to explain myself or debate anything. A simple “Thanks for sharing, I’ll keep it in mind” let me stay grounded without absorbing more than I had the space for. Your peace matters more than someone’s need to share their views.

It’s okay to step away from the noise

The festive season is full of movement and sound and people who want to pass the baby around. It can be a lot, even for someone who normally loves socialising. When you’re tired, touched out or overstimulated, that noise feels even louder.

Finding a quiet room, stepping outside for fresh air or heading home earlier than planned doesn’t make you antisocial. It’s a way of taking care of yourself. Sometimes a few minutes of stillness is exactly what helps you feel steady again.

You don’t owe a yes to everyone

The pressure to show up can feel intense, especially when there are family traditions and expectations involved. I used to stretch myself thin trying to be available for everyone. It took time to realise that my needs didn’t disappear just because it was Christmas.

You’re allowed to say no. You’re allowed to choose plans that actually support you. You’re allowed to do things differently this year. Your wellbeing matters just as much as anyone’s excitement about the holidays.

Protecting your energy is a valid choice

Growing a baby or caring for one already asks so much of your body and mind. Wanting a quieter, slower season doesn’t make you ungrateful. It makes you aware of what you need to stay well.

Protecting your energy isn’t selfish. It’s supportive. It’s necessary. It’s allowed. Every mum deserves the space to soften the parts of the season that feel too much.

Wherever you find yourself right now

If the festive season feels louder or heavier than you expected, please know there’s nothing wrong with you. Your capacity has changed and your priorities look different. That’s normal for any mama moving through early motherhood.

You’re allowed to protect your peace. You’re allowed to slow the pace. You’re allowed to make choices that feel right for you and your baby. You’re doing your best in a season that asks a lot, and that’s something to feel proud of.

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